Men Buying Tampons

Look at em all, they’re everywhere. Men with confused looks upon their faces. Here are four reasons you should never send a man to buy tampons: 1. It probably makes him uncomfortable. Well, unless he’s my kid, then he will juggle them in the store. 2. He doesn’t care about your stupid, bleeding vagina. Your…

Four Reasons I Screamed At Your Child

I am a reasonably patient person, I once waited at the Walmart deli counter for 25 minutes so I could save fifty cents. I went there for turkey, I was getting turkey. Children test my patience, frequently. They do not give one shit. Worse, since the little brats aren’t mine, I can’t take away one…

Really, Do I Hate Women?

Someone said that I hated women the other day. It’s actually quite shocking to see your name next to those words. I like women, I’ll tell a total stranger that she looks pretty or I love her hair, whatever, some bullshit, just go away. Really, do I hate women? Does it bother me when women…

Your Blog Income Report Is Bullsh*t

Frankly, I’m sick of reading them. Here is a quick synopsis of what I see when you post your blog income reports. Your bullshit income: Siteground: Siteground is incredible because I can sucker losers into signing up and I get referral credits (not actual money, just credits.) Design services: I can help you design your…

The Ghost In My Kitchen

So, I finally super cleaned my house! Not because of something I read on Pinterest, but because you sometimes have to do that. The happiness was short lived, I woke something up. There I was, all giggling away, I walked into the kitchen and it felt like a cloak of death surrounded me. There was…

Five Things I Learned When I Quit Smoking Marijuana

1. Pot affects your sleep, you think you’re sleeping, you’re not. Once you stop smoking, you’ll have the weirdest dreams of your life. 2. Pot affects your mood, once you quit smoking, you’ll never laugh at anything again. I mean really laugh, nope, never again. 3. Pot affects your smell. Now instead of smelling like…

Five Reasons My Blog Tanked

My blog tanked. And not in a way that can be simply explained, it’s summertime or it’s Christmas time, whatever. No, I lost fifty percent of my readers every month since February 2017. It has never recovered. A professional review of my blog (which is me with my glasses on) suggests the following: 1. I’m…

Don’t Be A Cheap Prick

I’m cheap, I like to save money because I want to spend it all on beer. All of it, every single dime I make wants to land at the beer store. I find that my cheapness often leads me down a dangerous path. Car repairs. Sure, anyone can do brakes in their back yard, why…