My Ugly Dress

16409503_10154099887861372_2075433428_o.pngIs it ok that you don’t like my dress?
We can still be friends, right? No?

So I bought this “cute” orange dress and learned some of my friends think it’s fugly. They were with me when I bought it and said nothing at the time.

They created signs, hats and costumes to protest my wearing of the dress. They littered the streets, looted businesses and shattered windows. They signed petitions, they whined and found safe spaces. They gathered by the thousands; burning flags, attacking police while chanting “Not My Dress.”

They went on twitter and facebook and name-called each other day and night. One group made the dress sound “cute”, another called it “slutty”. Do I impose a 90 day ban on wearing the dress to prove a point? Do I go to a higher authority for a ruling on the dress?

Sigh, life is way more than my dress. If I like a dress, I will wear it proudly, don’t be mad bro. Should we remain friends? It’s up to you however it is just a dress. No dress should come between friends. Did I choose my friends because of their clothes? No. That ass? Yes.

P.S. Are you supposed to be in this bathroom? Let me see your genitals. Hmmm, what precisely is that? (Man, I so miss last year.)

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73 comments on “My Ugly Dress

  1. Not that my opinion matters, but I like the dress.
    But then again, I’m really slow today and thinking that isn’t really the point, is it?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Jim says:

    well you know you could have gotten one in green and you would have had none of this fuss.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. jackcollier7 says:

    so cute, so clever. I love this ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Bill Mosca says:

    It’s not so much the dress; it’s the shoes. The [sic]souls are a bit thin, don’t you think?

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Raymond says:

    Loved this too 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Blog Andrew says:

    If that’s the orange dress I love it 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. bobcabkings says:

    Shall we call it “Dressgate”? Or, “Dresspocolypse”? One thing is sure, that your wit is showing. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Very well done. I don’t miss last year…and I worked hard at not losing friends. sigh…

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Bob says:

    Hot. So is the dress.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Daria Kill says:

    Yes, well there’s some subtext in that, isn’t there.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ralph says:

    Orange is my favourite colour 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I too miss last year! Great points, so well written. And yes, why can’t we all be friends? But, I can’t really compare my dress to something that effects so many in this country and around the world. Whichever side you’re on, huge changes are coming. PS. I’m on team orange dress

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Charlotte says:

    Oh, I see what we’re doing here 😉

    I like this dress! THIS DRESS THO. Just making that very clear, ha! Adorable post.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. bethanyk says:

    Freaking best post!!! Love it!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. webmdiva says:

    You’re so fucking brilliant, I can’t stand it. I love you and that dress!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. dgkaye says:

    So LOL, but I do like that dress, and I do love orange, okay, maybe not certain people with orange faces, but definitely orange dresses. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I love the dress & you!
    But wtf bitches, they let you buy something that they thought was ugly? SMH.
    #FridayFrivolity

    Liked by 1 person

  18. You’re a talented person
    I’m so glad to connect to you.
    Looking forward to more of your posts
    Check out my blog! 🙂

    Like

  19. There’ll be nationwide riots until that dress drops to the floor. And then we’ll all cheer; loudly!
    Well, I will, anyway.
    🙂
    PS I love the colour and the anticipation of rawness within.
    PPS It’s a great photograph.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Samantha says:

    “They were with me when I bought it and said nothing at the time.” – then they have no grounds to complain now. Something like: “Speak up now or forever hold your tongue.”

    The dress would not be my first choice (but I hate orange in any form), but it looks great on you. Besides, if you love it, who cares what others think!?

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Janice Wald says:

    Hi Laura,
    I don’t think it’s so ugly.
    Thanks for coming to the Blogger’s Pit Stop last week with your post.
    Janice, Pit Stop Crew

    Liked by 1 person

  22. CGHill says:

    Reblogged this on dustbury.com in reserve and commented:
    Some people simply will not say Yes to the dress.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. georgiakevin says:

    Your post is delightfully written but very profound!

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Alex Sarll says:

    Ha.. great post. I have just hit 100 followers, and you are one of those so I just wanted to say a massive THANK YOU, for supporting me. It means, a lot, and I’m currently trying to increase my web presence so if there is any way I could contribute posts to this site that would be awesome, I seem to remember you mentioning something along these lines ages ago and in typical fashion I am only just remembering.. I can be reliable, honest… 😉 So yes, let me know- I very much hope to hear more from you!

    Like

  25. joeysally20 says:

    Summer dresses, the quickest way to get yourself dressed and out and about. We arrive with our clothes on but sometimes we leave in a hurry only carrying them.

    Liked by 1 person

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