I see younger women with their cute, sexy bodies and am I jealous of them? No, when I was their age, I looked like that. Now let’s see if they look like me when they are my age. However, some days I look like a pile of old shoes, can’t beat that!
I see women dressed in five hundred dollar outfits, am I jealous? No, because at one time, I also spent piles of money on ridiculous crap, I have $260 sunglasses, ridiculous.
I see people eating thirty dollar steak dinners with lovely cocktails, am I jealous? No, unless it’s cheap beer in a can, I’m not happy. Have you even tried my four dollar casserole?
Want to make me jealous? Tell me that your dad was a neurosurgeon. Tell me that you have a nobel prize winner in your family. Tell that you spent your Sunday dinners discussing something other than an escaping prisoner getting his penis torn off.
Prisoner penis Pete, that’s how I grew up, I bet you’re jealous.