My Perverted, Drunken Valentine’s Day!!

My Perverted, Drunken Valentine's Day!!-minThis weekend I read about 682 posts on how to survive Valentine’s Day alone. There were your usual ideas:

1. Buy your own chocolates! Why wait for a suitor to purchase them for you? Buy your own, because you don’t already buy chocolates every day.

2. Send yourself a beautiful bouquet! Who loves you more than you? No one, go ahead and drop fifty bucks on flowers. So what if you are allergic to them, can’t afford it and don’t want them. It’s Valentine’s Day!

3. Spend times with those you love. You know, the same people who ask why you’re still single when you see them… sure, hang out with those guys.

4. Pamper Day! You deserve it, even though you spent five hundred bucks on booze last month, you go ahead and drop a couple hundred bucks on a full spa day. After all, you’re alone on Valentine’s Day!

5. Treat yourself to a fantastic dinner. Ok, be all alone in a restaurant full of couples. Lucky blinkin you.

All right, I’ve just dropped five hundred bucks because I am “alone on Valentine’s Day”.

I’m alone every day. I’m also alone on Christmas, New Years and Valentine’s Day. I also don’t have a mother on Mother’s Day or a father on Father’s Day.

There are a million posts on how to survive the holidays alone, can someone tell me how to survive a Tuesday?

It’s time someone wrote about how to survive a regular Tuesday.

How to survive Tuesday

Booze and masturbating, or maybe masturbating and booze, I’m not here to tell you how to love yourself. You got this.

PS Happy Valentine’s Day! Well, we’ve always said “Happy VD”.

My Perverted Drunken Valentines Day Pin-min

65 comments on “My Perverted, Drunken Valentine’s Day!!

  1. trismoore says:

    lol, this is great. I’ve spent plenty of holidays-and Tuesday’s alone. None of that crap works. All you do is spend money on a bunch of stuff that doesn’t make you feel better and come out feeling worse.
    However, a good book always makes the loneliness fade. At least for a little while for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. bobcabkings says:

    HoHum, just another day, nothing special, and that chocolate I would have bought for somebody else, yea, eat it. A huge benefit is not having to worry about getting that somebody else the wrong thing, We all know what a horror that can be. Great fun post.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ralph says:

    Call Tuesday “It’s nearly Friday day” 🙄 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I just make love sucks playlists. And buy chocolates.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Just 🎀 J says:

    OK I am thinking “here is a girl who knows me inside and out “..☺. This was my past year of “firsts “…my daughter was married this past August. I sent my ex boyfriend home three days before it.. Boyfriend of eight years. I was terminated from the job I loved and planned to retire from Jan 2015. Let’s say most of 2015 plain sucked!! I went to the wedding and intermingled with the ex husband and his wife.We were polite and l had a great time! ☺. I danced in my size 5 dress..👗… And I spent Christmas day alone.. New Years day.. My birthday alone. My sister invited me for Thanksgiving and it was nice. Just so alone. I will be spending Valentines day alone too. 💕.. And Easter and all other holidays prob. I am having a hard time six months later adjusting to being single and alone. I still hate it. But better than the toxic hell I had when my ex bf lived here. Two way street, just didn’t have room for his drama 👑 and issues. I don’t know how to act. I always did St Patricks Day and July 4th and major holidays with his family. My Dad and brother too have passed away. I have my dear Mom who is 91. I visit her and try to help at her place. I try to tell myself this “over processed ” Hallmark and Victoria’s Secret holiday is just that. But.. I am alone. I think it is timing. Daughter getting married the weekend of a volatile breakup. Severity of my job loss. Subsequent fruitless jobs since Jan 2015. Thank you for letting me ramble. ☺. I loved the post. Anyone have any good ideas for a woman who is still grieving so many losses??? 🌹 thank you 💕 ♥ 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I wait for the day after Valentine’s Day and stock up on discount chocolate.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Why do I have to wait until Valentine’s Day, or any holiday, to buy chocolate? Or wine? For myself or anyone else?

    I don’t do holidays. I do Tuesday’s. Sometimes Thursday’s. Wine and chocolate are great for that. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Aimer Boyz says:

    “Tuesday” !!! Like it 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Rica@ Yoga Mat Monkey says:

    Coffee and sarcasm. But you knew that!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. BeingBeckyy says:

    This is one of the best blog posts I’ve read by far. I love the honestly and I completely relate!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Katie Paul says:

    I had this one Valentine’s Day when I was still sort of married and I was sending inappropriate topless photos to someone else. It was confusing and weird. I think I ended up getting drunk and masturbating 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Haha! I don’t get the big deal about Valentine’s Day. I stopped celebrating it three years into my marriage because I got so bored with it. Blah! However, the one thing I’m looking forward to this year is watching The Walking Dead premiere episode. I got me a date with Rick and Daryl baby! I’m bringing the wine and chocolate with me:))

    Liked by 1 person

  13. At the end of the day, Valentine’s Day is just another day. Do what you want and don’t give it much more thought. Enjoy.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Steve says:

    Come to mine on a Tuesday

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I wasted a lot of my single years (ten to be exact😁) wishing I had red roses on V-Day. Those girls got flowers for putting up with a lot of BS and got dumped in the end anyway.
    Better alone in most cases!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Reblogged this on Skinny and Single and commented:

    Happy Valentine’s Day!!!


  17. Daria Kill says:

    Happy VD to all! That is hilarious.
    When I was a student waitress, my boss LOVED Valentine’s Day – a schmuck will easily part with money …

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Daria Kill says:

    Reblogged this on Let me give YOU the Moe-down and commented:
    I already buy my own damn chocolates.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Bill Mosca says:

    One of the things I miss being alone is eating in restaurants. My former career was a chef and then manager. I tried it after my wife passed, but it’s really the pits.
    Ignore VD if you can. Spring is just around the corner. Lots of good things happen then.
    And you don’t have to pay to see a sappy chick flick.;)

    Liked by 2 people

  20. Even my birthday isn’t special anymore.

    Instead, every day is a holiday, and I do what I want. Today, I took a walk, painted some more baseboard, worked on my next book, wrote a couple of blog posts, laughed, and I’m smiling right now as I write this comment. I’m feeling good.

    Holidays are just another day with a label but when every day is a holiday, labels like Valente’s Day, Christmas, New Year, etc. doesn’t mean anything because life is great.

    When life is great every day, there is no need to celebrate with booze, chocolate, eating out, etc. because you can do that anytime you want when every day is a holiday, a holiday without a name.

    Who cares if it is Tuesday, Friday or Sunday. Even the days don’t need names.


    Liked by 1 person

  21. Lisa Orchard says:

    LOL! Too funny!! And you make a very good point. I’ve been alone on Valentine’s Day before and it wasn’t that bad. I love my alone time. I read a book or take a bubble bath or even make cookie dough and eat the whole thing myself. Not in one sitting of course. 🙂 Thanks for the chuckle!

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Blog Andrew says:

    Eat chocolates 😉 ‘play with yourself’ eat more chocolates, then grab a bottle of wine (or 2) and go round to some friends house and get drunk together!!!! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Blog Andrew says:

    In all seriousness 😦 I’ll be alone as well x

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Hahah! Over here (in Finland) it’s called Friend’s Day and women give each other little gifts or cute cards (back when people still wrote cards). The men don’t really want to participate in the whole thing so there’s no romance, just friendship 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  25. I feel isolated even in a group…I’d skip the booze—I’m a diabetic—but then, what do I know?

    Liked by 1 person

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