Wait, is that being IN a onesie? Can mine have giraffes on it? Please? Fine, I’ll never get a giraffe onesie.

What the heck is with people lately? This is an actual question posed to a single friend of mine.

In addition, someone asked me what I’m going to do when I’m old.
Firstly, I’m pretty old now.
Secondly, a relationship now doesn’t guarantee a lifetime.
Thirdly, why you so darn depressing? You see someone happy and single, leave them to it.

When I’m old, don’t you worry, I will have “giraffe onesie” money because you know they’re gonna sell big time.